9 of 10 Rappers Prefer Global Chillin To Global Warming
Los Angeles, CA-- In a study released today 90 percent of rappers surveyed said they prefer global chilling to global warming. This study highlights how the fear of the effects of global warming has now spread from scientists to other fields, like hip-hop musicians. Global warming, a hot topic of late, has become a world-wide issue of debate. While the debate over man's involvement heats up, these homies are content to chill.
"I ain't about to snitch on my homies for drivin those hydraulic bouncing six-fo' impalas even though the gas mileage ain't the best," said West Coast Rapper Snoop Dogg. "I prefer to cool out and chill."
The study shows that rappers, who have long been known for having their mind on their money, have started to think more seriously about wider social and environmental issues. In the past some rappers have teamed up to highlight the problem of global warming. Now there are others who are adding their voice to the movement.
"See these ice cubes?" said Pharrell Williams pointing to his diamond studded jewelry. "They are a symbol of the fragile nature of the polar ice caps and are a reminder to us of the duty each of us has to reduce green[-in-the-]house gas emissions."
While rappers are able to talk the eco-talk, some critics say they donít do enough to walk the eco-walk. Known for riding around in gas guzzling SUVís like Hummers and Escalades as well as driving high-performance sports cars which burn large amounts of specialty fuels, there are some aspects of a rap super-starís lifestyle that seem inconsistent with an environmentally friendly lifestyle.
"Another aspect of the hip-hop lifestyle that adds to the carbon emissions problem is the indo smoking. Yeah, that's right I said it, 'Up in Smoke Tour' homies," said scientist John H. Crabtree. "No one has done even a cursory study of the impact of marijuana smoke and its contribution to rising global temperatures. This important issue needs to be carefully researched, and I intend to get the government to fund my studies."
Just as on the streets some hip-hop artists pack heat for protection, rappers are quick to defend themselves against critics. One thing they point to is that the phrase "rolling wití my homies" is just a synonym for car pooling. They also point out that their behavior is no different than that of self-proclaimed Global Warming spokesman Al Gore.
"We be riding in private jets and yachts. Ainít no different than Al Gore with his fancy mansion and personal aircraft," said one rapper, who spoke on the condition of anonymity since the cops are on his tail. "This is just another manifestation of the inherent racism in this country. Dudes donít say nothing about a white guy flying his plane, but as soon as a brother tries to fly in his jet haters want to ground him."
The non-scientific study consisted of a one-question phone survey administered by Generally Awesome. The question was "do you prefer global warming or do you just want everybody to chill?" One respondent, Denny Blaze, said he doesnít want to chill. The other seven rappers asked this question said they preferred chillin'.
"Some would question our math, since we only asked eight rappers this question," said senior vice president of polling for Generally Awesome, Dr. John H. Crabtree. "But you have to keep in mind that we also questioned Dr. Dre and Eminem, who are such huge forces in the Hop-Hop world that we had to count their vote as double. Since we also interviewed Jay-Z, Fablous, Young Buck, and the Game, I think that pretty much addresses the issue of a statistically significant sample."
Poll results include a margin of error at +/-98%.
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